Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Venus VS. Mars

Is there a kernel of truth in every stereotype? Probably.

Sometimes (not always)I soooo feel this way about... ahem, MEN! AKA, boys.



Class 1
The Toilet Paper Roll - Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 2
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Then Setting It Back Down?
Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 3
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor
-Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.

Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 6
Needing Constant Attention When Sick - How to Break The Cycle
Examples on video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 7
Loss Of Identity - Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 8
Learning How To Find Things - Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost - Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Class 10
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy - Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 11
The Stove/Oven - What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.
P.S. I love you, honey, I really do ;-)

Go ahead male readers, make fun of women now! I won't mind. Payback's a beotch!


Dr. Mohamed said...

Where do I download the sign-up sheet? :)

Unknown said...

Way to rock the list Christina!!! I think these are all useful classes and there should be a sign-up sheet ready to go!

Unknown said...

Toooooooo funny!! My husband grew up in a foreign country on the other side of the world and he STILL does much of this! I think it must be a genetic "guy" thing. ^_^

JEM said...

HILARIOUS. My favorite one was the laundry hamper vs. bathroom floor, with graphical representations. Can I get a sign up form?

Erica Mitchell said...

AH hahaha! Too funny, and so true. I could really use the class on what is the stove, and the difference between the floor and the hamper...any floor, for DH. Thanks for the laugh this morning I needed it :)

JE said...

*Sigh* If only these were real, I would sign the hubs up in split second!


Maddy said...

Where can I sign the hubby up??? :)

Elana Johnson said...

ROTFL! This is frawesome!

Tahereh said...


Melissa said...

hahaha. This is awesome. AWESOME. I laughed so hard.

Clara said...

That was so funny!! Loved all of them, specially number 9!!
Thanks for this!

Matthew MacNish said...

There is a hint of truth to this, I promise.

Why is it that when I lose something it's always in the last place my girlfriend looks?

Anonymous said...

My hubby needs all these classes, especially the oven/stove one. He claims he can't cook, yet he flew flighter jets...how does that work?

Pamela Gold said...

Along the lines of looking for stuff, it helps to move other stuff out of the way to see what's below it!

Hey.... Do you have a "Labels" section on your blog? I want to click it so I can read all your past book reviews. I'm making a list of all the books I have to read. It rules!

Shannon Messenger said...

*Snert* I love it. Especially the part about needing constant attention when sick. WHY do men need so much care? Why?

Rachele Alpine said...

Could we petition and see if they'll also run a class called, "Did you know that the dishwasher is five inches from the sink that you just put your dirty bowl in?" Thanks! :)

Sharlene T. said...

Where are the classes?...I don't have a hubby, but I don't mind borrowing one just to get him there...great classes...

Melissa B. said...

The book has some truth to it. I bought it for my daughter when she broke up with her long-time BF this past Spring. As for the toilet seat? Just make sure you look first in the middle of the nite before sitting down to pee...

Lourie said...

How much does this school cost???

Anonymous said...

Haha, I love these! :D

Little Ms J said...

Oh. My. God. I had no idea that other men lost their shit all the freaking time. My husband loses at least three articles of clothing per week, his wallet at least once a month and we're on his third wedding ring. I swear I'm going to buy him a 12-pack of tin rings. I can't tell you how many times he's stated, "If we don't find my favorite jeans I'm not going." I have to count to ten not to kill him.

Small Burst said...

you're so freaking funny! are classes 10 and 11 full. I know someone who need to enroll. LOL.

Small Burst said...

Almost forgot-thanks for stopping by on my SITS day!!

Saumya said...

This is awesome!!! You have a great blog here! I would definitely sign up for these classes and make my boyfriend do the same :)

Andrea said...

love.it. Hahahahaha!

Tina L. Hook said...

I know a little someone who could seriously benefit from class #3. And a few of the others.

Great post!